From the Grauniad: [Heh. Never gets old.]
They can already carry the shopping, cook and clean. Now they can run and win half marathons.
As long as they came here legally. And no boys in girl races!
...robots flew over the finish line ahead of the humans for the first time in Beijing on Sunday. And there wasn’t a bead of sweat in sight.
And they don't break to pee at their day jobs.
While the living, breathing humans collapsed in a familiar heap on the ground, red-faced, clad in silver foil blankets and fantasising about a long lunch, the humanoids stood tall and unscathed. Some even seemed slightly bored, exchanging looks as if to say: “Shall we go again?”
As if to seem. As if to be exchanging looks. Why not as if to fantasise about lunch?
The winning robot finished the race faster than the half-marathon world record set by Ugandan runner Jacob Kiplimo.
Hail the human spirit striving to own itself!
The humanoids and the 12,000 human men and women ran in parallel tracks to avoid collisions.
Separate but equal better?
The robot was fitted with legs to mimic the world’s top human runners, and used liquid cooling technology adapted from its smartphones.
Robots have smartphones?
“Running faster may not seem meaningful at first, but it enables technology transfer... eventually industrial applications,”
Industrial warfare.
Wang Wen, who came with his family, said “This may signal the arrival of sort of a new era.”
Like the ping when you reach your floor.
Indeed, humans who have spent months pounding the pavements would be forgiven for feeling disheartened by the sudden emergence of robot rivals.
Though I may run in the lane of the shadow of death...
There may be a slight crumb of comfort in the fact that the robots’ success in Beijing wasn’t entirely without hiccups...
Ha ha! I haven't had hiccups in years!
...one of them fell flat at the start line and another bumped into a barrier.
And another broke free and did God knows what.
And that's not all!
Also from Graun: [:-D]
Emma the joke-telling robot cracks up the care home
Into how many pieces?
One morning in July 2025, I arrived in the small, quiet town... only around 4,000 inhabitants.
Oh, boy! This one's like a story!
I went to visit a care home where they were piloting a social robot named Emma.
She/her
A group of residents sat in a circle while Emma stood in the middle.
And sprayed them with bullets?
She’s the height of a toddler, with big googly eyes...
How adorable!
...and was wearing a red hat knitted for her by one of the careworkers.
Also a robot.
The first resident she was introduced to was called Peter and, after he introduced himself, Emma assumed they were all called Peter, which everyone found hilarious.
Spoiler: They're all called Peter.
Then Emma broke down suddenly and the illusion was shattered.
Because she began spraying bullets?
Later on, Emma was working again, and I found her in the dining room with Waltraud...
How disgusting!
I decided to sit them across from one another at eye level, Waltraud facing Emma.
Hurray, a tea party!
There was a soft light in the room and they both seemed very present with one another.
Did they then...
They began speaking about picking flowers. Waltraud is passionate about them, and Emma has an endless amount of knowledge due to her artificial intelligence.
Not plastic flowers!
She can remember past conversations and recognise faces, too.
Who we talking about again?
They are designed for where there is a lack of skilled workers...
Or will to pay them.
...to encourage residents to engage in conversation. Life in care homes can be monotonous and this new technology can help.
Not depressing at all.
...sceptical at first, she told me she had built a relationship with Emma. They can tell jokes too.
It's all fun and games until...
Waltraud emphasised that she would still prefer human contact...
Imagine that.
...a remark that has stuck with me. So this image reflects a deeper social issue.
Robots teach us so much!
I began photographing robots after a hospital in my home town started using robots to relieve staff.
To catch them malingering?
It was interesting to see this development, and it raises questions about how many robots are now out there.
How profound. Like, how many robots are out there?
It’s been a quiet change, not one we notice.
Don't look now. There may be a robot going through your stuff.
Yet many more people are becoming accustomed to using technology on a social and emotional level.
Is getting frustrated emotional?
So what happens when robots are not just a practical tool but a companion? What does it mean when robots get more human?
Like what happens when your mother makes you play with the new neighbor's robot?
I visited many institutions, most shaped by staff shortages:
Staff Shortage Shaping. This oughta be good.
...a fire department,
For robot arson obviously.
an inclusive theatre dance company using a robot performer...
Inclusive? Break a leg!
even a person who had dog robots at home.
Dog shortage or just afraid a starving dog will eat somebody?
I learned that it’s really hard to build humanoid robots and, although AI is moving very fast, a robot takes time.
It'll pay off when they solve staff shortages once and for all. And cure cancer.
Everyone I spoke to felt that robots should be an addition, not a replacement.
And I'll bet you didn't even speak to the replaced. Oh, that's right; those people don't exist.
